


Spider

by solitudeofself



Category: Hockey RPF
Genre: M/M
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2014-07-05
Updated: 2014-07-05
Packaged: 2018-02-07 12:44:00
Rating: Explicit
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,097
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/1899486
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/solitudeofself/pseuds/solitudeofself
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>Someone prompted this forever ago: "there is a spider on their bathroom door and pat is all flaily scared (& screaming for cyanide so that he can end his life on his terms) and jonny is acting all stoic and brave (ofc he has to) but he is a little scared too an they are trapped in the said bathroom. porn/hilarity ensues. and sharpy is outside making fun of them (like always)."</p><p>And so I added more porn and finally have the courage to post it.</p>
            </blockquote>





	Spider

**Author's Note:**

> I didn't have anyone beta this so if you see anything wrong please let me know. Thanks!

Patrick is washing his hands when he notices it… the huge spider right by the bathroom doorknob. “Oh shit, oh shit… oh shit,” he moans, backing quickly away from the door before bumping into the bathtub. He lands with a crash into Jonny’s massive jet tub; knocking bottles everywhere.

“Pat? Are you okay, man? Don’t break any of my shit,” Jonny calls from the hallway.

“I’m fine… there’s just a giant ass spider in here.”

“Seriously,” Jonny replies, and Patrick can imagine the eye roll, “Just grab some toilet paper and flush it.” Patrick can feel the blush creeping up his cheeks even though no one is here to see him. Fuck his life. Fuck spiders.

“I really can’t… it’s right by the door knob. I’m going to be trapped in here forever, aren’t I? Get me some cyanide or something so I can just die on my own terms.”

“Oh for fuck’s sake,” Jonny sighs, “I’m coming in.” Much to the delight of Patrick’s bruised ego, Jonny pushes the door open quickly and edges towards Kaner. “Where is it?” He has reached for the toilet brush and is brandishing it like a sword between Patrick and the door.

“My hero,” Pat smiles from his position in the tub, “Right there by the knob.” Just as Jonny is making a valiant effort to locate the spider by pushing the door closed with his makeshift sword Sharpy’s head appears in the doorway.

His eyes widen before his face splits into a grin. “Am I interrupting something?”

“No you asshole there’s a fucking spider!” Patrick yells pointing and attempting to get out of the bathtub.

“Aw, Peeks is Jonny here trying to save you?” Patrick’s cheeks flame at the comment and Sharpy actually cackles before pulling the door closed. “I’ll just be out here keeping watch so the other guys don’t come snooping around. Take all the time you two need.”

“Sharpy open the fucking door now!” Still clutching the toilet brush Jonny throws his hands in the air.

“Oh my God. I’m really going to die in your bathroom from a spider bite… this is it. Deadspin articles everywhere,” Patrick whines, slumping back into the tub.

“Don’t be so dramatic. We’ll be fine.” Jonny’s eyes darken as he turns back to face the door. A slight shiver runs up Jonny’s body the moment he notices the spider and it makes Patrick smile. Jonny takes a breath before stepping up to the door and squishing the spider with the head of the toilet brush. “I got it… I got it,” he repeats almost as much to comfort himself as Patrick before sticking the brush into the toilet and flushing.

“My knight in shining armor,” Patrick leers, fluttering his eyelashes. “Now help me out of the tub so we can get out of here.” Patrick sticks his hand out but Jonny leans against the sink with a smug look. “What? What’s that look for?” Jonny shrugs and looks towards the door with a smirk forming. “Wha… ohhhhhh. You think you deserve a reward?”

“Sharpy is guarding the door,” Jonny helpfully supplies and Patrick is rapidly getting turned on.

“Well, it was a pretty huge spider.”

“Ginormous,” Jonny adds as Patrick is stepping out of the tub.

“Humongous,” Patrick smiles as he is dropping to his knees in front of Jonny. Patrick mouths Jonny’s dick through his shorts causing Jonny to groan and grip his hands in Kaner’s hair. 

“Come on. Sharpy isn’t going to sit out there forever,” he breathes, voice getting lower and deeper and making Patrick’s dick ache. Out of spite he mouths around some more, bringing his hands up to massage Jonny’s massive, beautiful thighs. “Kaner… come on.” Finally, Patrick lowers the zipper and pulls out Jonny’s dick; pushing down his underwear and shorts just enough that he can get his mouth on the tip. Jonny bucks off the counter at the contact and moans.

“Wait… are you guys actually hooking up in there right now?” Sharpy calls through the door just as Kaner tongues the underside of Jonny’s dick from the base to the tip. Jonny groans and Sharpy lets out a loud “Fuck! I’m out of here.” Kaner can vaguely hear Sharpy’s footsteps retreating down the hall over Jonny’s vocalizations but he is more concerned with swirling his tongue around the tip of Jonny’s cock before sliding down as far as he can.

“Yeah… like that. Finally,” Jonny sighs, as Kaner sets a steady rhythm; hollowing his cheeks and adding suction. Jonny isn’t quiet about the whole thing and it isn’t long before Patrick is rubbing himself through his jeans, moaning around Jonny’s thick, heavy dick in his mouth. The hand in his hair tightens and he can hear Jonny’s breathing coming in short bursts. “Pat… I’m close. Can I… please?” 

Patrick knows what he is asking for and he looks up through his lashes at Jonny, who is red-faced with sweat beading on his forehead. Patrick nods slightly. Jonny tangles his other hand into Pat’s hair as Patrick grips his thighs. Jonny fucks into his mouth and Kaner gags a few times before Jonny’s come mixes with the drool dripping down his chin. Patrick swallows as much as he can before pulling back. He’s breathing heavily as Jonny drops down in front of him to pull his dick out of his shorts.

Jonny kisses him then; his fingers running through the mess on Kaner’s chin and it’s that as much as the friction and heat on his dick that has him coming and groaning into the kiss. They break apart panting and Jonny slumps back against the cabinet, grinning lazily. “I think that more than makes up for my heroic efforts today.”  


“And they say chivalry is dead,” Patrick quips pulling himself to his feet and offering his hand to Jonny. “But, ugh. I’m definitely going to need to borrow some clothes,” he adds, pointing to the stain that had dripped down to his shirt and the streaks of come on his pants. He looks up to see Jonny’s dark, lusty gaze focused on the mess.

“Maybe I’ll just make you wear it… show it off to the boys downstairs.” His eyebrows raise questioningly. And Kaner wants to be disgusted by it and to tell Jonny to fuck off but his dick twitches and his hesitation gives him away. “Something for next time then,” he smirks, before pulling the door open. “Come on we can make it to my room without anyone noticing.” It’s a little shocking to Patrick how let down he is.


End file.
